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NVC Resources on Feelings

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No Sacrifices, Please

Trainer Tip I’ve never sought success in order to get fame and money; it’s the talent and passion that count in success. —Ingrid Bergman When someone suffers for my success, we both lose. It is anti-success. In a win-lose situation everyone loses. My goal is to live in a world where no one’s success depends on anyone else’s pain and where no one’s needs are sacrificed. There is enough love,...
Bringing a Dead Conversation Back to Life

Trainer Tip "Sometimes I forget completely what companionship is." —Rumi Let’s say you’re sitting at the dinner table with your new brother-in-law who is talking and talking and talking about stuff that you simply cannot relate to and don’t care a whit about. You could get up and leave the table, sit there and think what an incredible bore he is, invest some energy noticing every flaw in his...
Directness

Trainer Tip The abstinent run away from what they desire, but carry their desires with them. —Bhagavadgita Isn’t it kinder to be indirect? Do I have to tell the whole truth? Yep, I say that direct honesty is the only answer. Indirectness can easily cause confusion and pain as people try to figure out what we mean. Such communication can prolong the inevitable pain and even deepen it. I think...
I Want to Repair a Relationship, But I am Scared

Miki Kashtan hosts Living Room Radio Show on KPFA Radio 94.1FM in Berkeley, California, USA. Listen as she works with a mother who is experiencing a strained relationship with her recently married daughter after a verbal “attack” from the daughter. Miki guides the caller to connect with her feelings of fear and her needs for ease of connection, and to further connect with her daughter’s needs....
Parenting Series: Listening for the Needs

Using her own and participants’ examples, Inbal enlightens parents on where they might be struggling with connecting to their children’s needs, especially in situations where the children are responding to the parent’s request. Inbal offers a new definition of interdependence, then explores the variety of feelings and needs that can be present in any given situation between parent and child,...
Principles of Nonviolent Communication

Let this inspiring video guide you through exercises as if you are actually present at the workshop with Mary Mackenzie! The video opens with Mary leading you through an exercise that generates a physical experience of the NVC consciousness. You will then explore the concept of "needs" in the NVC process, examine feelings and finally learn the NVC process of self-empathy. True to Mary's style,...
Experiencing the Energy of Your Needs Meditation

Mary Mackenzie leads listeners through a guided meditation to experience the energy of needs that was created and written by Barbara Larson, CNVC Certified Trainer. This meditation will support you to connect to your feelings and needs in the moment, and to experience the unique and deep energetic quality of that primary need. Keywords: living energy of needs feelings needs observation presence...
Workplace Series: Two Strategies for Adapting NVC into the Workplace

Listen to Miki discuss two strategies for bringing NVC into the workplace in ways most likely to be well received. First Miki explains why it's best to focus more on needs than feelings in business environments. Second, she talks about unpacking needs into phrases as a way of enhancing workplace connection. Keywords: demands empathy exercises/practices expression feelings honesty needs requests...
Preparing for Difficult Dialogue

Effective and connected dialogue requires significant self-awareness, mindfulness, and skill. You can focus on any of these six areas that most often escape your awareness: anchoring and staying grounded; boundaries; thoughts and beliefs; stuckness or attachment; feelings and needs; and requests. Read on for a list of questions to help you focus on how to do that. Read this article Keywords:...
Opening to Intimacy

Trainer Tip "The deepest need of man is the need to overcome his separateness, to leave the prison of his aloneness." ——Erich Fromm Some time ago, I was at a gathering of 2,000 people. I was feeling very sad, vulnerable, and lonely, so I chose to sit by myself in a crowd of people I didn’t know. Then I heard my name blaring across the crowd. A group of my friends were calling me over to sit...