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NVC Resources on Feelings

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Pause Difficult Conversations with Skill and Self-Connection

Oren Jay Sofer explains how we can stay grounded and maintain choice during overwhelming or emotionally charged conversations. He highlights the importance of presence—feeling our feet, noticing our breath, and expanding our awareness—to counter the fight-or-flight response and self-regulate. Oren also teaches a simple three-part structure for pausing a conversation without damaging the...
Deescalate Yourself:

In times of conflict, it’s easy to lose touch with ourselves and our needs. In this heartfelt session, Jesse Wiens Chu shares three practical centering practices—rooted in the principles of Nonviolent Communication (NVC)—to help you find your way back to self-connection, empathy, and choice. Through accessible tools drawn from both personal experience and frontline work, you’ll learn how to...
When Someone Doesn’t Appreciate Our Honesty

Trainer Tip Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom. —Thomas Jefferson Not everyone will receive your honesty with joy. If they seem unhappy, this is an indication that they have unmet needs, not that you have made them unhappy. Remember that feelings are a result of met or unmet needs; a situation is only the stimulus of feelings, not the cause. When someone doesn’t appreciate your...
Tips for the Road Series Tip 16

Along with it’s potential for helping others calm their emotions and feel deeply understood, the Nonviolent Communication process of empathetic listening can help someone increase their capacity for finding their own truth. Receiving advice and input from others might seem very helpful when you are going through an emotionally challenging situation. However, receiving advice and input doesn’t...
Embodying Compassion Exercise

I recommend doing these exercises at least one time daily. First Process: Connecting to and feeling the Life Impulse Guided meditation: Bring your awareness to the inner experience that’s going on with you right now. There’s nothing to do with it other than to notice and be with it. Feel what is going on in you as life, life impulse, life feeling. Breathe into whatever you are feeling now....
Transforming Painful Patterns

Common Obstacles to Success Why is it so difficult to change our patterns even when we want to, even when we experience shame or despair about them? Here are common pitfalls: Trying to change a pattern while playing it out Focusing on changing a behavior, usually quickly and forcefully, without empathic listening to ourselves (our needs and feelings in particular) Grounding our motivation for...
9 Skills for Navigating Conflict

Access this complete 8 session course Do you long for more reliable access to NVC when you need it the most? When conflict erupts, NVC skills can sometimes seem so far away. When you feel separate, enflamed with uncomfortable emotions and judgment, NVC can seem like the farthest thing from your mind. During those times it can be all too easy just to react when what you may really want to do is...
Social Dynamics During the Holidays

During the holiday season we may find ourselves taking responsibility for other's feelings, which can lead to guilt, shame, depression, and resentment. These feelings are exacerbated by the habitual pattern we call the "Vortex of Submission" (being hooked by a sense of duty and obligation). Read on for ways to recognize and break the pattern. Read This Tip Keywords: submission duty obligation...
Healing and Reconciliation

Access this complete 7 session course Witness facilitating conflict between individuals and members of a group, where you’ll learn four immensely helpful and practical processes. These have been designed to dramatically augment your ability to respond effectively to and facilitate difficult situations – enabling you, the mediator, to ease suffering and create peaceful, fair solutions you can...
Complex Truth-Telling And Empowered Change

"Our bodies don’t want to spend their energy denying, suppressing, avoiding, and averting. They want to live organically in what’s true for them. They want their messages to be received, so they can move, shift, and flow with the rhythms of life." Have you noticed a tendency in yourself to try to "look on the bright side" when things are feeling chaotic or painful? It makes so much sense why we...