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NVC Resources on Requests

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Clarifying Our Needs

for the situation. This trainer tip is an excerpt from Mary Mackenzie's book Peaceful Living, available from PuddleDancer Press. Keywords: practice Trainer Tip self sabotage habits reactivity requests Mary Mackenzie
Covert Compassion

business setting How to make a Symbiotic Request that acknowledges holding multiple needs Please note: This is an excerpt from the 2014 NVC in Business Conference. Keywords: empathy honesty needs requests strategies compassion connection dialogue intention relationships workplace honest expression authenticity fear business work Applied NVC Jeff Brown
Creating More Efficient Meetings

object to this?” Again, she expresses her need—to protect pets and maintain the view, and a request—Does anyone object to this? When participants focus on expressing their needs and making clear requests, meetings become more efficient and enjoyable. If a participant is unfamiliar with this process, anyone can ask her for clarity about her needs and what she would like back from the group. In...
Needs-Based Negotiation

do what I wanted, I would feel angry and hurt. If they did comply with my demand, they had succumbed to the pressure I inflicted. Now I believe that the best opportunity for success when we make requests of others, including our superiors, is to speak openly and honestly, value the other person’s needs, and create solutions that value both parties’ needs. When we create situations that value one...
Self-Management = More Joy at Work

first, crucial step is to learn how to change your behavior to impact what's happening. For example, we can get the inner clarity we need to reframe questions we ask ourselves, recap, make clear requests, give concrete feedback, etc. This article expands on how self-management can increase influence... Read this article Keywords: Self management management leadership Behavior change request...
What Does It Mean To Be Heard Deeply And How Can You Ask For It?

There are five aspects helpful to consider when creating conditions and atmosphere where you can be heard deeply and hear others deeply: context, self-connection, autonomy, security, and specific requests. Read on for more, and reflect on moments when you have been heard deeply and name everything that contributed to that experience. Read this article Keywords: being heard request dialogue...
Six Ways That Support You Being Heard

support you in being heard. These are clarity about the topic and needs; supportive conditions; respect for autonomy; sharing your intention; attending to emotional security; and making clear requests. Read this practice exercise Keywords: being heard request LaShelle Lowe-Charde Elia Lowe Charde
Working With Others' Mixed “Yes”

you are not confident that it was agreed to freely or joyfully. Then explore your response to their “yes”, and possible unexpressed "no", with related observations, judgements, feelings, needs, requests, and alternate strategies that come up. Read this practice exercise Keywords: submission yes behind the no duty obligation mixed yes empathy Inbal Kashtan Miki Kashtan
How To Create Supportive Conditions For Sharing Vulnerably

through body language, facial cues and words. To expand your capacity to share more vulnerably you can create supportive conditions and timing. You can ask for feedback by making in-the-moment requests of others and yourself before and after you share. Read this practice exercise Keywords: vulnerability intimacy being seen being heard honest expression connection request LaShelle Lowe-Charde...
The NVC Model

The more we practice NVC by “rote” --going through OFNR (“Observations, Feelings, Needs, Requests”) on automatic-- the more likely our NVC practice would lead to disconnection. The purpose of our NVC practice is to use this NVC "map" (OFNR) to support us in integrating the consciousness of the NVC (eg. operating with the intention to connect, collaborate, etc). Once we let the map drop away, we...