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NVC Resources on Connection

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Meeting Our Need for Sexual Expression

might not be an effective way to start the conversation. Consider saying to her: “I’ve noticed that the last few times we have made love, you have not seemed as present as usual. I miss the connection we have when we are both present and enjoying our lovemaking. Have you also enjoyed that connection?”v This acknowledges what you have enjoyed about your love life in the past and also gives her a...
How Anger Can Help or Hinder

make a request for a change. That is, you might set a boundary and then invite them to brainstorm with you and find creative ideas for how to navigate challenging situations with more skill and connection. Thoughts that fan the flame of anger are like a child having a tantrum. Children have tantrums because they can't yet accept that reality is different than they expect or would like. Like...
Empathizing with Someone Who is Silent

Trainer Tip Empathize with silence by listening to the feelings and needs behind it./em> —Marshall B. Rosenberg, Ph.D....
My Group is in Conflict, I Want It to Stop

Miki Kashtan hosted Living Room Radio Show on KPFA Radio 94.1FM in Berkeley, California, USA. Listen as she works with a caller who outlines a conflict between two people who are crucial to the cohesiveness of a dance troupe and asks, “What do you do when you see a conflict between two people in a group, when you are not directly involved?” Miki starts by acknowledging the challenge of...
On Love and Empathy

Ask the Trainer: Is there any difference between the concept or experience of "love" and that of "empathy?"
Punishment, Needs and the Protective Use of Force

Ask the Trainer: For many years I have been using crime and punishment (reward and consequences) to discipline because it was the only thing I knew. I knew deep in my heart it was alienating me...
How to Interact with an Angry Practice Group Member

Ask the Trainer Dear Trainer, I would like some suggestions on how to interact with a member of the practice group I started. This individual speaks and acts in a manner I interpret as angry and controlling, and not aligned with the principles of Nonviolent Communication. Recently I requested that he not use the term “NVC” in sending out emails about our practice meetings, citing the guidelines...
Supporting Our Loved Ones In Living Authentically

Trainer Tip Stand up and play the melody. I am God. —Rumi So you finally figured out how to live authentically. That is, you are more likely to do things because they meet your needs than because you think other people want you to. What a relief! You might also feel some frustration because the people in your life are still trying to figure you out, rather than making decisions that meet their...
Nonviolent Communication Circle of Life

and celebrate life. ~ MIDDLE CIRCLE ~ This circle represents NVC consciousness to value everyone’s needs and keep attention focused in the present moment. Our Intention is for compassionate Connection (with self and others) which invites Choice and Freedom. ~ OUTER CIRCLE ~ When we find ourselves using habitual reactive speech patterns, we can lose our balance and operate from the outer circle....
Core Beliefs and Gratitude Exercise

needs for relaxation, joy, authenticity and equality can be met. I feel really sad to think I’ve spent so much of my energy for so many years trying to prove my worth, rather than having a clear connection to my non-negotiable worth. I’m sad that I have not valued and trusted all the things I bring to this world as much as other people’s perceptions of what I do or do not offer. I’m realizing...