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Observation, Feelings, Needs, and Requests (OFNR) Communication Components

Observation vs. Evaluation/Judgment Observation is awareness of what we perceive with our senses – sight, sound, touch, taste, smell — and also of our thoughts (images, words, concepts, evaluations). In language, we can describe purely what we are observing (i.e. words we hear, actions we see from our subjective frame of reference) separate from words that evaluate (e.g. liking or disliking,...
Living In Joy

Trainer Tip To be successful, the first thing to do is fall in love with your work. —Sister Mary Lauretta We all have daily activities that don’t seem fun. Mine are cooking, lighting a fire, and cleaning the cat box. For years I grumbled about these things and I could find no joy in them at all, until I started to connect to the needs I was trying to meet with each activity. Each morning for...
Creating the Life You Want With Powerful Requests

by the other person's response to our request, and how to speak and make requests in such a way that the other person is more likely to open their heart. Keywords: requests connection requests demands empathy exercises/practices expression feelings honesty needs self empathy strategies connection listening relationships Miki Kashtan
Not Trusting the “Yes”

focused on a role play with the woman and the grocery clerk, enhancing learning about how to participate in a role play and how to stay connected to ourselves and others in a role play. Keywords: demands empathy honesty requests role play connection dialogue personal growth conflict resolution relationships power Miki Kashtan
Parenting Series: When Your Child Only Has "No" for an Answer

better connect to the needs behind your child’s behavior. Equally important, Inbal also imparts practical wisdom on how to help children understand their parent’s needs. Keywords: consciousness demands empathy giraffe and jackal honesty self empathy anger blame compassion judgment personal growth self compassion conflict resolution families parenting disagreement is progress Inbal Kashtan
Mediating Conflict for Yourself and Others

conflict Successfully mediate the conflicts in your own life Create peace between the warring voices in your own head Apply mediation skills to conflict coaching and working with groups Keywords: demands needs presence argument compassion connection healing judgment mediation workplace family Conflict disagreement is progress John Kinyon
Every Angry Message is a "Please"

behind it. When you can hear it as “please,” does it shift how you feel? This trainer tip is an excerpt from Mary Mackenzie's book Peaceful Living, available from PuddleDancer Press. Keywords: demands expression honesty needs strategies anger argument compassion connection healing judgment personal growth conflict resolution families relationships workplace Family Conflict family communication...
Wanting Fully without Attachment

Redefine needs: shifting from need as lack to need as life Live in peace with unmet needs Overcome the experience of “rejection” when hearing a “no” {attachment:all} Keywords: beauty of the needs demands needs strategies relationships Miki Kashtan
Improving Relationships as a Primary Goal

rather than to connect, then shift your focus to connection with others. This trainer tip is an excerpt from Mary Mackenzie's book Peaceful Living, available from PuddleDancer Press. Keywords: demands empathy strategies relationships relationship connection Mary Mackenzie
Transforming Anger

and may also be key to our survival as human beings. Join John Kinyon to learn this essential life skill through the Enemy Image Process and Learning/Growth Spiral. {attachment:all} Keywords: demands empathy feelings jackal show needs presence requests self empathy compassion conflict resolution relationships jackal talk authenticity vulnerability enemy images intensity triggers John Kinyon