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NVC Resources on Strategies

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Empathy And Strategies For Overwhelm

Making decisions from overwhelm can be costly for you and others. Instead, to get distance name overwhelm as it comes. Apply self-compassion. Be suspicious of your impulse to withdraw. Find ways to meet your needs. Tell others about your overwhelm. This may allow more support, connection and trust-building. Plan what to do to meet your needs next time you're overwhelmed. Tweak your plan. Read...
Tips for the Road Series Tip 5

and embrace your feelings and needs, your nervous system can relax, and you will have a more integrated brain from which to find different solutions. Keywords: self restraint empathy requests strategies contribution responsibility self responsibility advice Eric Bowers
Going Deep

Onion." It illustrates a process for uncovering the Universal Human Needs — the deeper motivations — that underlie words and behaviors we may find disturbing or puzzling. Introduction: Needs vs Strategies One of the premises in NVC is that behind all behavior and expressions are Universal Human Needs as the deeper motivators. And one of the key distinctions in NVC is that between Needs and...
Sexual Expression

bonding, connection, love, communion, acceptance, and creativity—given this list of needs, it's clear why sex is such a sought after activity. Naming these needs opens the door to other strategies besides sex. This becomes critical in a partnership where one partner is more interested in having sex than the other. A sense of flexibility and creativity in meeting any need, including sexual...
Confidentiality Agreement

to arise in a moment of conflict: Identify the needs of Party A (which is what you have been focusing on, I think almost exclusively) Have Party A connect with the need itself, separate from the strategies and the attachment to meeting the need. I have rarely seen this happen, unfortunately, and imagine if people paid attention to it more, more conflicts would resolve themselves. Have Party B...
NVC as a Strategy

Tip I care not so much what I am in the opinion of others as what I am in my own; I would be rich of myself, and not by borrowing. —Michel Eyquem de Montaigne Human needs are universal and strategies are specific. Well, Compassionate Communication is a process, but also a strategy. The needs I try to meet by living and teaching this process are harmony, peace, fun, love, safety, joy, and deeper...
Connecting to Humanity

parents move in with their grown children. We all try to meet our need for family in one way or another. Similarly, we all need shelter, but we may live in houses, tents, huts, or castles. Our strategies differ, but our needs are the same. This is what connects human beings across all cultures and lifestyles. The next time you are in conflict and catch yourself thinking that the other person...
Change Happens

for that! Try new things and enjoy them. Notice which needs you meet with each activity, and which you do not. Stay connected to your life in ways that meet your needs, be willing to adopt strategies that best serve you, and you will find more joy and interest in life. It is inevitable. Be open to changing your strategies to best serve your needs today. This trainer tip is an excerpt from Mary...
Flexible Parenting

Roxy Manning discusses the tendency to get attached to certain parenting strategies for control and emphasizes the importance of attuning to the child's needs rather than imposing fixed ideas of right or wrong. Using a personal example of being labeled a "bad child" for taking off uncomfortable dresses, Roxy highlights the need to observe and understand the child's perspective. She stresses the...
Thank You: Finding the Gift in Everything That Happens

Jim and Jori Manske share strategies for employing gratitude to create more joy in life, jettisoning the fear of asking for what you want, and welcoming feedback no matter how it is delivered. Try this thought experiment exercise designed to: Train yourself to become aware of the presence of conflict Engage in a perspective broader than your habitual reactive patterns Engage your curiosity to...