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NVC Resources on Needs

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Daily Self-Empathy Practice

Want to expand your needs vocabulary, and build your capacity to identify needs — even when you’ve been triggered? Check out Mary’s powerful teaching on Self-Empathy. Keywords: triggers expression self empowerment jackal talk jackal show understanding consciousness feelings needs presence self empathy compassion connection gratitude healing personal growth self compassion self talk...
Punishment, Needs and the Protective Use of Force

Ask the Trainer: For many years I have been using crime and punishment (reward and consequences) to discipline because it was the only thing I knew. I knew deep in my heart it was alienating me...
Core Beliefs and Gratitude Exercise

How core beliefs may keep us from fully experiencing gratitude: Some of my core beliefs make experiencing gratitude difficult. For example, it’s difficult to celebrate others or myself when I think I have to prove my worth in order to be accepted. So much energy goes into proving myself, there’s little left for celebration. I find that when I clarify my core beliefs and the underlying needs...
Looking at “Shoulds”

Using real-life examples from class participants, Sylvia Haskvitz demonstrates the life-changing results of clarifying the needs underlying "shoulds." Some of the situations covered in this audio are: A grandmother shares how she was able to spend time with her grandchildren even when experiencing estrangement from her daughter A father examines how to repair a conversation with his daughter A...
Principles of Nonviolent Communication

Let this inspiring video guide you through exercises as if you are actually present at the workshop with Mary Mackenzie! The video opens with Mary leading you through an exercise that generates a physical experience of the NVC consciousness. You will then explore the concept of "needs" in the NVC process, examine feelings and finally learn the NVC process of self-empathy. True to Mary's style,...
NVC Tools

In this introduction to Nonviolent Communication (NVC), Wes Taylor discusses the two basic aspects of NVC, the consciousness and the tools that help manifest the consciousness. By using his own examples and those put forth by participants, Wes touches on the following key differentiations of NVC: Needs vs. strategies Protective use of force vs. punitive use of force Requests vs. demands...
On Self-Empathy

What is self-empathy? Mary Mackenzie leads you on an exploration of self-empathy through an exercise that will show you how you can easily connect more deeply with your needs. Keywords: exercises/practices giraffe and jackal needs observation self empathy strategies self compassion self talk self connection NVC examples universal human needs Mary Mackenzie Mark Schultz
Connection Requests

Connection requests focus on the quality of connection between people instead of on any particular strategy or solution. While the core motivation for a connection request may be connection with the other person, varied internal states and needs may help guide us toward different types of connection requests. Self-connection and understanding of our motivation in making a connection request can...
Addictions

In this compelling dialogue, veteran CNVC Certified Trainers, Susan Skye and Mary Mackenzie, discuss the intrinsic needs present in addictive behaviors, and how Nonviolent Communication aligns with the 12-step programs’ process for treating addiction. Some of the topics discussed in this dialogue include: The alignment with NVC and 12-step programs How NVC can complement the 12-step process...
Moving From Blame to Self-Responsibility

Often when someone else does something we don’t like, it’s easy to get pulled into blaming the other person. After all, we have all been trained to focus on fault and punishment when needs are not met. What can we do to shift that pattern? Until we actually know that we’re triggered and that we are under the seduction of blame, we will have no room to maneuver. Releasing blame requires moving...