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NVC Resources on Demands

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his own examples and those put forth by participants, Wes touches on the following key differentiations of NVC: Needs vs. strategies Protective use of force vs. punitive use of force Requests vs. demands Keywords: consciousness demands feelings needs observation protective use of force requests strategies connection inspiration personal growth OFNR universal human needs Wes Taylor
NVC LIfe Hacks 11

request: when we say something, we're usually expecting something else — perhaps something subtle — in return. Let's look at how to make requests clearer and more do-able, avoiding the pitfall of demands. Keywords: trainer tips requests demands doable request Shantigarbha Warren
Expressing and Receiving No in NVC Consciousness

“yes” to give someone else. Listen as John works with participants' real life situations, demonstrating how to give and receive a "no" from a consciousness of interpersonal connection. Keywords: demands empathy feelings needs presence requests self empathy compassion self compassion conflict resolution relationships authenticity vulnerability enemy images intensity triggers John Kinyon
The Four D's of Disconnection

You are lazy and only care about yourself! I feel sad and frustrated because I have a need to be seen as a caring person. Are you feeling frustrated because you value cooperation? Keywords: demands exercises/practices requests blame jackal talk choice diagnosis deserve disconnection Introduction to NVC learning tool Jim Manske Jori Manske ©2008 peaceworks jim and jori manske radicalcompassion.com
Intrinsic Need for Respect

that represents the quality of a life-serving intrinsic need Respect that requires bolstering from outside oneself that masquerades as a demand, yet is perceived as an extrinsic need Keywords: demands empathy feelings needs connection inspiration personal growth relationships Susan Skye
Setting Loving Boundaries

This session touches on concepts like narcissism, codependence, and shame while providing a nonviolent reframing of those dynamics. This will help you understand the differences between demands, ultimatums, limits, boundaries, and agreements as you learn how to talk about your internal boundaries before they become painful issues in your relationships. Keywords: NVC Spirit boundary limits demand...
Honor Your Need to be Heard

When you want to be heard, first check if your listener is available. This honors yourself, and the other person’s choice about listening. You need to be clear about wanting a particular quality of listening, and that you are willing to wait if that isn’t available in the moment. Read on for how to ask for listening in a way that can build trust that your request isn't a demand. Read this...
Unpacking OFNR - Requests

Many believe it's only a true NVC request when we can ask for what we need without urgency or insistence. But what if we're the target of oppression and hate in a world with systemic inequality? Is it still nonviolence to abdicate power by allowing the person enacting harm to be the one to decide whether harm continues? The intensity of the need, degree of harm, and how chronically unmet the...
Making Requests Count

Trainer Tip There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening, that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. And, if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost. —Martha Graham The first three components of the Nonviolent Communication process clarify our observations, feelings,...
Moving Beyond Needs as Met or Unmet

Sometimes when we regard needs as something that could be met or unmet by another person or by a situation we unconsciously hold the belief that our needs should be met. Or we end up holding blame or implying wrongdoing. People are more likely to resist a request made from this stance. Instead, here are practices to increasingly losen any remaining attachment or demand energy -- and open our...